we should have the courage to go after our dreams, despite the very real risk that we'll fail in some way or other. Being resilient means that when we do fail, we bounce back, we have the strength to learn the lessons we need to learn, and we can move on to bigger and better things.
Overall, resilience gives us the power to overcome setbacks, so that we can live the life we've always imagined.(atleast we can give it a try. )
According to the research of leading psychologist, Susan Kobasa, there are three elements that are essential to resilience:
- Challenge – Resilient people view a difficulty as a challenge, not as a paralyzing event. They look at their failures and mistakes as lessons to be learned from, and as opportunities for growth. They don't view them as a negative reflection on their abilities or self-worth.
- Commitment – Resilient people are committed to their lives and their goals, and they have a compelling reason to get out of bed in the morning. Commitment isn't just restricted to their work – they commit to their relationships, their friendships, the causes they care about, and their religious or spiritual beliefs.
- Personal Control – Resilient people spend their time and energy focusing on situations and events that they have control over. Because they put their efforts where they can have the most impact, they feel empowered and confident. Those who spend time worrying about uncontrollable events can often feel lost, helpless, and powerless to take action.
Another leading psychologist, Martin Seligman, says the way that we explain setbacks to ourselves is also important. (He talks in terms of optimism and pessimism rather than resilience, however, the effect is essentially the same.) This "explanatory style" is made up of three main elements:
- Permanence – People who are optimistic (and therefore have more resilience) see the effects of bad events as temporary rather than permanent. For instance, they might say "My boss didn't like the work I did on that project" rather than "My boss never likes my work."
- Pervasiveness – Resilient people don't let setbacks or bad events affect other unrelated areas of their lives. For instance, they would say "I'm not very good at this" rather than "I'm no good at anything."
- Personalization – People who have resilience don't blame themselves when bad events occur. Instead, they see other people, or the circumstances, as the cause. For instance, they might say "I didn't get the support I needed to finish that project successfully," rather than "I messed that project up because I can't do my job."
10 Ways to Build Your
Resilience
The good news is that even if you're not a naturally resilient person, you can learn to develop a resilient mindset and attitude. To do so, incorporate the following into your daily life:
Know Yourself- What do you really know about yourself?What do you think you should know about yourself?
What makes you tick?
The most important subject none of
us have ever been taught is how to
learn about ourselves.
Self-knowledge will enable you to use your energy more efficiently by aligning your habits with your purpose. The more you know about yourself, the more confidence you’ll have in your decisions.
The most effective way for learning about yourself is through self-experimentation and self-assessment.
My Purpose, My “Why”
the work I have chosen to do.
Understanding my purpose gives both
direction and meaning to my life. It
grounds me in my values when I have
a very important decision to make
and keeps me focused on my core
beliefs.
What’s my “Why?”
I believe everyone has a great untold story inside of them that deserves to be told. I want to give people permission to themselves to create that untold story by designing their lifestyle around the work they’ve always wanted to do.
My Values
my values are
- choose time and experiences over
money and material possessions
- keep things as simple as possible
- challenge the status and “make
it happens
- family first
- be frugal, not cheap
- work from anywhere
- be genuine
My Motivations
My core motivation is to help people
design their lifestyle around more
meaningful work.
My natural motivations included
supporting my family, meeting new
people, having new experiences,
travel, being outside and learning
something new.
Any combination of these motivations
will get me to take action and sustain
my momentum.
My Energy Needs
My “peak performance period” is in the
morning and I need time to restore to
increase my personal productivity.
My Work Needs
I’m a highly motivated person , so I
generally prefer working on my own.
I do value doses of collaboration
throughout the week to challenge my
thinking and perspectives. I don’t
value endless meetings.
What Restores Me
- I need at least 8 hours of sleep every
night.
- I need to chill out after 8pm at night.
- Exercise helps me burn off anxious energy.
- Meditation helps put on the breaks of my frantic thoughts as I wake up each day.
- Going for a walk
My Natural Preferences and Tendencies
There is much we can change about
ourselves, but our natural preferences
and tendencies makes us who are are
as unique individuals.
My Learning Style
I love reading. When I learn a new
concept for the first time, I generally
prefer picking up a book about it.
Then I try practicing the concepts or
skills on my own.
When I get stuck, that’s when I reach
out to an expert with a specific
question. Finally, I develop a routine
for mastering the skills.
I definitely learn better by “doing”.
My Strengths and Abilities
Learner
“People who are especially talented in
the Learner theme have a great desire
to learn and want to continuously
improve. In particular, the process of
learning, rather than the outcome,
excites them.”
Strategic
“People who are especially talented in
the Strategic theme create alternative
ways to proceed. Faced with any
given scenario, they can quickly spot
the relevant patterns and issues.”
Responsibility
“People who are especially talented in
the Responsibility theme take
psychological ownership of what they
say they will do. They are committed
to stable values such as honesty and
loyalty.”
Intellection
“People who are especially talented in
the Intellection theme are
characterized by their intellectual
activity. They are introspective and
appreciate intellectual discussions.”
Relator
“People who are especially talented in
the Relator theme enjoy close
relationships with others. They find
deep satisfaction in working hard with
friends to achieve a goal.”
My Personality
My Emotional Intelligence
My Source of Confidence
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